Oh, and I didn't win the award. I saw the piece that did ( Read more... )

I dream often of being crazy.

Not the crazy I'm used to, really... not the crazy I live with. The crazy I could be. The crazy I could have become... and I guess in many cases the crazy I still have the capability of becoming. A few months ago it was classic nightmare shit combined with the mournful words of a therapist overheard by my dream-self: "I ( Read more... )

Today is a day on which I will have luck.... because today is a day on which I believe that I deserve it.

End of sentence, end of story. And now it's true.

Sitting here writing downstairs in the dark. It kind of brings back memories, but only in that general nostalgic way. I can safely say that this house shares nothing in common with my parents' place... and while this isn't a bad thing at all, I can't help feeling slightly misplaced, and I think I have figured out exactly why.

It actually occurred to ( Read more... )

I've joined the community mission101_2009 and have made my list of 101 goals to be completed in 1001 days. It was really insane making this list... Marly pointed out to me that I haven't looked this far into the future since... well, ever I suppose. The fact that I'm going to be 25 when this is all finished is kind of baffling. And the goals that I set... I feel ( Read more... )

I'd like to explain to you the overwhelming relief I feel... if only I could find adequate words to describe it!

Really... I can't find a way to begin.

Well, I suppose it would help if I reminded you that Richard and I are moving out on August 1st, to live with three friends of ours in a very nice house just around the corner from my parents' house. ( Read more... )

I'm a little miffed that my sleeping schedule is still fucked up, but it isn't so bad. I must say, the Geodon seems to be having a positive effect already. I slept from 2 pm off and on until about 1:30 am, with a big break between nine and eleven for dinner and seeing Richard for a little. When he went to work, I didn't pout as much, and when I ( Read more... )

Just watching my mom snooze on the couch in front of the TV. Reminded me of a very wonderful woman going through a hell of a time in Group (that whole experience happened a year ago I just realized). She would come in to Check In and would announce, with a shy smile, that she had slept in her own bed, not on the sofa. Everyone would clap for her ( Read more... )